martinis and mischief

“Welcome to being a ruling queen, Mary. Men will trust you and die.These are the first. But they won’t be the last. It’ll go on and on, until your death, because that’s the way it works. And a beautiful, young queen, the men are gonna throw themselves into the fire for you, my dear. They’ll shoulder lost causes and take on risks they should never take. In time, you’ll get used to it.”

kniterly:

Hampster in a teeny knitted sweater!

kniterly:

Hampster in a teeny knitted sweater!

[x]

You know, funny story: There’s this craft store called Michaels. Look, my sister knits, and she goes to Michaels. So my sister called me and she’s like, “Oh my god, I’m at Michaels, picking up yarn. You have a poster at Michaels.” I’m like, “What?” She’s like, “There’s a poster, there’s a Falcon poster at Michaels.” I’m like, “Holy s**t!” She’s like, “I’m gonna come and pick you up, and we’re gonna see your poster in this store.” So she picks me up and we go to Michaels.

We go in, and I see the poster and I’m like, “Oh, this is….” She’s like, “I know, I know.” I said, “I’m gonna sign these posters.” I was like, “That would be amazing, you buy a poster and it’s like, actually signed by the Falcon.” Like, it would blow my mind. So I go to the front, I buy a Sharpie, I run back to the back of the store. And she’s like, “I’m gonna take a picture of you signing it.”

I’m in this store and I’m signing all the posters. The manager comes out, he’s like, “Hey, whatcha doing?” I was like, “Oh man, I’m signing these posters so when people buy ‘em, they’re signed.” He’s like, “Well, people are not gonna buy ‘em if they’re signed.” And I was like, “No, no, no, it’s cool. I’m pretty sure there won’t be a problem.” And he goes, “Yeah, but it is gonna be a problem, you’re messin’ up my inventory.” And I’m like, “No, my man, trust me. I mean, I’m the Falcon, that’s me!” And he goes, “Yeah, right. You’re gonna buy those posters.” I said, “What?” He’s like, “You’re gonna buy all those posters or I’m gonna call the police.”

He rolls up all the posters and goes to the front of the store. And I had to buy like 60 Falcon posters that I signed in Michaels.

-Anthony Mackie getting in trouble for signing his posters at a Micheals  (x) 

Anthony Mackie is a gift to all mankind. 

(via bartdontlie)

sansasturk:

SIGNAL BOOST!!!!

This video might be the most clever way to raise money for dogs in need, because all you need to do is watch it.

"Just by watching these puppies, you’re raising money for dogs in need," says the narrator in the video above. "You see, if a video goes viral, YouTube shares the money they made from advertising with whoever made the video, and in this case, every dollar we earn will go toward feeding, treating and finding homes for dogs who haven’t been as lucky as us."

The video comes from The Pedigree Adoption Drive, and ends by imploring viewers to share because the more views received, the more money will be raised.

So share this video. You know, for the dogs.

mewiet:

retrogradeworks:

I love to see children who are so delicate and gentle with animals.  It warms my heart amidst a sea of brats pulling cats’ tails and getting whacked.

Also JESUS THAT’S A SNUGGLY CHICKEN.

I love how she reaches up on her tippy toes to snuggle into his shoulder.

mesogeios:

Last week, I learned that the English language has more euphemisms for death than any other language. I learned that the ancient Greeks had no word for the colour blue and that the Hawain alphabet has only twelve letters. I spent last week hollowing out a little place in my heart…

donewithwoodenteeth:

One thing I would like to make note on that D&D did with Sansa that I appreciated is her ability to sit through the “War of the Five Kings” farce of a show. It’s hard to illustrate mental strength in a medium like television (or at least while keeping it interesting.)…

whirrring:

thetiredgames:

Dachshund U.N.

For three weekends, 47 Dachshunds, more commonly known as Sausage Dogs, will attempt to solve the world’s Human Rights issues.”

this was so important

wildpuncake:

Hah